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They happen every day—those frustrating,
circular “I’m right, you’re wrong!” arguments. What’s at risk may be as
life-changing as whether or not your kid drops out of college, your aging parent
goes into a nursing home, or your boss gives you the promotion you want. Or it
may be as commonplace as getting the insurance company to approve your claim.
These situations often frustrate both parties, stall progress, and hurt
relationships. But they don’t have to.
In I’m Right, You’re Wrong, Now What? Dr. Xavier Amador, a Columbia University
professor and clinical psychologist shows you how to break nearly any impasse
and persuade your opponent—for that’s what people become when you’ve reached an
impasse—to give you what you need. I’m Right, You’re Wrong, Now What? is based
on Dr. Amador’s LISTEN-EMPATHIZE-AGREE-PARTNER (LEAP) method. A highly
successful program that has been taught to tens of thousands of people in
seminars around the U.S. and overseas, LEAP teaches you how to turn even toxic
arguments into healthy disagreements that end with you getting what you need.
Built on timeless psychological truths and new research, LEAP is a roadmap for
improving the quality and health of any relationship. LEAP will actually show
you how to convince the other person to help you, while increasing mutual
respect and trust. Perhaps most importantly, it will help you make that
all-important distinction between what you want and what you need. Dr. Amador’s
LEAP program includes techniques on how to:
· diffuse anger and lower defenses
· get past stubbornness and even denial
· make your opponent ask for your opinion . . . instead of railing against it
· turn adversaries into allies
· create positive and productive relationships
At home, at work and in life, LEAP demonstrates how winning is not about hearing
the other person say “You’re right,” it’s about getting him to give you what you
need—even when he doesn’t agree with you.
“Dr. Amador’s LEAP method takes you by the hand and heart and leads you to an
understanding that gives you the power to break the impasse and get what you
need. This will be an invaluable tool for anyone who wants to get past "I'm right and you're wrong!" I know of nothing even in the same league.”
—Gerry Spence, author of How to Argue and Win Every Time
Reviews
"Dr. Amador's LEAP method takes you by the hand and heart and leads you to an understanding that gives you the power to break the impasse and get what you need. This will be an invaluable tool for anyone who wants to get past ‘I'm right and you're wrong!’ I know of nothing even in the same league."
—Gerry Spence, trial lawyer and author of the New York Times best seller How to Argue and Win Every Time
"Xavier Amador knows what he's talking about. 'I'm right, you're wrong' happens every day, especially at the office, and with this book, you can learn to win those arguments and find the best way to move forward without burning bridges."
—Jeffrey J. Fox, author of HOW TO BECOME A RAINMAKER and HOW TO BECOME CEO
The techniques Dr. Amador offers are exactly those used in international diplomacy in reconciliation and conflict resolution situations. The book is a practical guide to working around and through problems that is useful on many different levels.
—Robert P. Finn, Woodrow Wilson School of Public and International Affairs, Princeton University, and past U.S. Ambassador to Afghanistan
"This practical and insightful book is an invaluable guide to anyone seeking common ground with an adversary and a way to move forward together."
—Gabriele Borla, PhD, International Criminal Court, The Hague
"I’m Right, You’re Wrong, Now What? is right on target. Dr. Amador gives specific pointers about how to communicate, listen and resolve impasses. It's hard to imagine anyone who couldn't benefit from this practical and empowering guide to making your relationships better."
—Robert L. Leahy, Ph.D., author of The Worry Cure: Seven Steps to Stop Worry from Stopping You, and President, International Association for Cognitive Psychotherapy
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